Yes, I am a stay-at-home mom.
Yes, My first priority is my child.
Yes, I talk about her a lot.
Yes, sometimes she is the only person I talk to all day.
BUT
I am still an individual who has a life with my own goals, trials, heartaches, and talents.
As a society moms are often looked down upon or put on a lower pedestal than a woman working toward a degree, in medical school, or making 100,000+ a year. "Your "just" a mom because you couldn't possibly do anything else with your life" or "your "just" a mom, what do you do or know about anything?" There are many theories of why people think this way. I have narrowed it down to a few myths people tend to believe.
THE MYTHS:
1. Moms couldn't possibly have time for anything else other than being a mom, so that's all they do. 2. Being a mom is a think-less job.
3. Moms are moms because they weren't qualified or motivated enough to do anything else with their lives.
4. Life couldn't possibly be that hard because Moms stay at home all day.
THE BUSTED MYTHS:
1. Yes, it is hard to find free time as a mom, and yes it is something that I struggle with, BUT I DO find it. I am a mom, and I strive to be a good one, BUT I also have hobbies, goals, and talents. I'm still the same person I was before having a baby. In my free time I work on art, crafts, scrap-booking, running, blogging, etc.. Some moms go to work, others stay at home, some sell their crafts or art online, some write, give service, or fulfill a need in the community. We are not JUST moms. We are not only making a difference in our children's lives but those around us as well. If someone asks me what I do, I say I'm a mom. The conversation usually stops there. A good follow up question for this would be: what do you enjoying doing? What are some of your hobbies? what projects are you currently working on? (most moms have one)
2. Speaking of "just" being a mom. When did this word "just" get put in front? As if being a mom WERE a think-less job. "Oh, that's ALL you do". If being a mom were a think-less job, there would be way less crime, hate, and abuse in the world. Being a mom is hard work. If I'm sick, I STILL have to get out of bed. I don't get to call in sick. I plan my baby's whole day: when she eats, what she eats, how much she eats, when to sleep and for how long, I make sure she gets her daily exercise, bath, play time, learning time, t.v. time, and love time. I change her diaper at least 5 times a day. I have to discipline her; No, don't touch that, eat that, throw that, spit that, touch me, or hit me. If she wakes up in the middle of the night, I'm there. I clean up toys, splattered food, throw up, and spit up. I have been more exhausted sometimes after a full day with her then after working a 12 hour shift. And I've done both! Since when did pushing a human being out of you and then raising them for life become "just" some job?
3. Believe it or not, I am the same individual now that I was before I had a child. Now, of course we all change and grow up, as I have previously acknowledged, but I'm still Charlie. I don't disappear because I have kids. I still dream, I still have things I want to accomplish for myself and for my family. I still enjoy hanging out with friends, having a good time, and seeing a movie. I still push myself to be a better person and disciple. I have talents that I work on and some that I want to develop. I went to school. I got a degree. I've worked to earn a living. I did a study abroad program, I've had several job opportunities, I've met all kinds of people, made all kinds of friends and had all kinds of experiences. Yes, these have prepared me to be a mom, but they also make me the person that I am. I didn't give up a career because I wasn't qualified or motivated, I gave it up because I chose to stay at home with my kids. Don't write me off because I have kids. I am still a person, and I can still DO things.
4. I have often heard and talked to moms who have been a working mom, and then later made the decision to stay at home with their kids. A lot of these moms say staying at home was harder. Now, I'm not saying that this is always the case nor am I saying that working moms don't have it hard, cause they do. What I AM saying is that being a stay-at-home mom isn't always sunshine and puppies. It is hard work! (as explained in #2) It is my career. A very much underpaid career, BUT a career nonetheless. It is a struggle, but one that I endure because I know that I can make a difference in my children's lives and, consequentially, a difference in the world.
For all I know I could be raising the next Sheri Dew, Marjorie Hinckley, Oprah Winfrey, Mother Theresa, Michelle Obama, or Sheryl Swoops. Haha, :)
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